Blogging from one of my favorite locations today: Cups and Mugs - if you're in Rome or near Rome ever, you need to check this place out. The environment is entirely too inviting for words.
Late last night I had an extended quiet time that was beautiful. Unfortunately, I was so tired that I almost fell asleep a few times, but I've been reading through 1 and 2 Corinthians lately and stumbled upon a few crazy things last night that I want to share.
2 Corinthians 1:8-9 "For we do not want you to be unaware of our affliction that took place in the province of Asia: we were completely overwhelmed -- beyond our strength -- so that we even despaired of life. However, we personally had a death sentence within ourselves so that we would not trust in ourselves, but in God who raises the dead."
I chose the HCS version for this on purpose. I read the ESV and MSG which are my go-to for a more trans-literal translation of the scripture, but I love the picture this particular version paints. What really struck me was the part that says "we personally had a death sentence within ourselves." This may not be the way it was intended, but think about it: these people purposefully stepped so far out of their comfort zones in order to truly trust God.
I've been learning a lot about trust lately. The project I'm doing for my 2D design class right now is actually based around the word "trust." Trust isn't necessarily ignorant, though I think we often see it that way. Trust is knowing the potential outcomes of a situation and doing it any way (my personal definition). In some situations, that's called being stubborn. Maybe there's a bit of stubbornness that comes with trust.
This scripture is like saying, "We gave ourselves a death sentence - purposefully taking an absolutely irreversible step in the Lord - by pushing ourselves as far out of our comfort zone as possible so that we absolutely cannot depend on ourselves."
How WILD is that?! So often we sit in our comfort zones or, if we do dare take a step outside what we can control, outside the box we've put God in, we only put our big toe out there. The rest of us stays inside. We're not willing to LEAP. We're not willing to have the soles of our feet touch the raging currents of the overflowing Jordan river at harvest time in order to see God move. We won't give Him that much. We'll simply compartmentalize and give Him our big toe - give Him our nothing in essence.
I know nothing about trust. I want to know what it means to trust. This has been such a life-long learning process for me.
In the face of blaring memories that want to convince you this time will be no different.
In the face of no concrete outcome.
In the face of complacency.
2 Corinthians 2:11 says, "...so that we may not be taken advantage of by Satan; for we are not ignorant of his intentions."
Division. Chaos. Confusion. Doubt.
We aren't ignorant of Satan's tactics to call on our insecurities and our wounds. The verse before this calls us to forgive - forgive so that Satan can't come into your mind through the hole of hurt, anger, and frustration. Be at peace in the Lord! Be full of His righteousness and love, overflowing in forgiveness to those around you.
Trust God with those situations you can't control and forgive. Let Him carry it. Let Him move in you. Trust Him - take an irreversible step and see what He does.
He might part the waters for you.