02 June 2011


Today is one of those days when I just feel helpless all over and inside. I'm not in a bad mood and nothing has really happened out of the ordinary, but life seem so much heavier today.

I tend to take on the emotions and feeling of characters in the novels I'm reading - today might be a product of such. I started Francine Rivers's Redeeming Love this morning - yep, it's taken me this long to get around to it. That was purposeful. Everyone swears by this book and that didn't fit well with my anti-romance attitude a few years back. Part of that attitude came from the idea of fantasy - why build myself up for something that wouldn't happen to me (more the specific romance part, not the love part)? It was an understandable phase, but it's well past time to move on. It was a needed lesson.

Someone said something to me recently that implied that women are weak and therefore more easily deceived than men..and men are not weak or fearful. I'm having a hard time with this. Maybe it's the feminist in me? I believe with my whole heart that God created men and women for purposes specific to each, and I'm well aware that Eve took the first bite of the apple, but must we forget that Adam took the apple from Eve? Jesus says the Spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak (Matthew 26:41). The flesh - all of it - is weak and easily deceived. Women are more emotional, yes, but do emotions signify weakness? If so, crying really is bad and we all need to suck it up, rub some dirt in it, and move on. A marriage is a partnership, not a dominion.

I'm not trying to cause controversy and I've never claimed to have anything right so please correct me, inform me, teach me.

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