29 April 2010


I'm a pretty straight-up, honest kind of person. It's not often that I get angry or frustrated enough to let anyone really have it, but I've come to a place in the past few days where I just don't know if I should voice my concerns and frustrations or simply keep quiet because it's the right thing to do.

Having been in a depressed state many times earlier in my life and come far from that, it is hard for me to be around people who simply complain constantly. People will bother you. Professors will be irrational. The weather will be ridiculous. But even in all of this, there's tons of other things going right in life to praise rather than dwell on these few bad moments. It's a hard place to come to and I don't have it right all the time. Maybe I'm being too harsh by expecting this from people, especially with my background, but I'm having a hard time seeing that right now. I really can't stand to be around people who complain and if you start in on it constantly or repetitively in a short span of time, I'm going to stop hanging out with you or wanting to be around you.
Now, if there's something legitimately wrong - besides petty complaints - that's a different story. Venting frustrations and emotions are normal in those situations, but not when simply nagging about every little thing.

Two-faced people also frustrate me to no end. I am extremely open and honest - if you're upsetting me, I'm probably going to tell you. Give me a little bit of space, but I promise we'll talk it out soon. I'm not angry for long if I am angry. I'm never going to say one thing and do another, or tell another person something different from that. You will ALWAYS know where you stand with me. I guess I've been through enough to realize that friendship should be different than the high school state of mind. If I feel like you're being two-faced, I'm probably going to drop you like a ton of bricks. Selfishly, I'm pretty much not in the mood to get hurt again or deal with the high school drama of it all.

I'm well past wanting to walk away right now, but I really think God's been trying to show me that running away isn't always the best thing to do. With the way people are acting right now, I'm having a hard time not throwing up my hands and just giving up.

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