Neglect

I've made a point of being honest and transparent over the past few years, but the last few months have been lacking in that department on this little blog. Let me fill you in on a few secrets:

• I've been alone SO much in the past two weeks, but I still feel like I've had no alone time.
• Instead of getting in the Word on the daily, I usually watch tv or read another book...even when I know in my mind and consciously realize that I should get in the Word.
• I don't know where to start. I'm overwhelmed by the opportunities God's presented me, but I just feel like I have a writer's block..a spiritual block and a big part of me doesn't want to know what it is or how to get rid of it.
• I feel like I'm completely unfeeling when it comes to my family. I'm leaving two days after Christmas and not coming back until March or May, but my house is suffocating. It's not the size, it's the fact that I have so little to do. I feel confined. At school I can at least walk somewhere on campus.
• I depend too much on my friends. I think that's part of why I feel the need to go (along with a ton of other reasons) after I graduate. I depend on them for everything..to the point that I sometimes think I can't make a good decision without them.
• That's where my lack of spirituality comes into play. So much of me is tired of this complacent me and wants to get rid of it, but I don't know where to begin so I just ignore it.

I miss being in the Word. I miss blogging about all the things God's taught me. I miss being saturated in it. Praying through this drought because I know where I need to be and I know how to get there...even when I'd rather not acknowledge it.